Firstly, I was shown our galaxy and all of the stars thereof, in a lucid dream/astral projection experience. My guide was pointing them out and said, "You see that bright one? That is you." Then he began to point out even more bright stars and he very matter of factly said, "That one is you as well". Then he pointed to others that I could barely see due to their dim nature and he nodded knowingly and said, "That's you, also. That one is also your brothers and sisters. You all are made from star matter and created by Source".
In true Morgan Freeman style, my guide lowered his voice and said, "Here is the catch. You are all also one person." I glared at him, confused and bewildered and he returned a smile and said, "You are all a part of the original Creator. You aren't just his "children" (as you so often like to put it), you are a piece of Source's Being. You are all created from the same matter, even. You have your differences maybe in spiritual lessons and reasons for incarnating on your planet, but you are still a part of each other and a part of Creator."
Seeing the confusion written all over my face, we stopped our journey through the galaxy and sat down on a park bench with a vast view of thousands of brilliant, sparkling stars, shining like crazy diamonds. A comet shot across the sky wildly as if slung from a cosmic sling shot by an unattended child somewhere on a different planet. "So is it a crime, and are there repercussions or punishments?" I asked the guide.
Resting his elbow on his knee while star gazing, he turned his face towards me and knowingly said, "It is a spiritual crisis. A choice. However, you must understand that there are natural consequences to every choice." Suddenly the night screen of stars changed and flashed into darkness, then it turned into a movie of my dearest and closest friend's life. It was like watching a movie of her holding and rocking her babies, playing at the park with them, her long brunette hair flowing in the wind as she pushed her daughter on the playground swing set. I could hear her son giggling in the background as he played in a sand box, dumping sand all over his freshly washed hair. "Would you kill her?" the guide said softly and turned his big, brown eyes to meet mine.
"WHAT? Of course I can't kill my best friend. She's like my sister, what are you talking about?" I angrily yelled back at him. He maintained a soft smile and knowingly said, "But you are one. If you kill you, you kill her. She is a child of creator. She is made from the same material as you. From God matter. From the stars, even. She is family."
"But my life is MINE, I was born with free will, you said so. All religious texts say so! I can do with my life what I will!" I angrily responded once more. "Your life is a gift, dear one. It is the same gift given to her. You can't take gifts away."
My angry glare was then accompanied by a frown as I tried to wrap my head around his answers. "Stop talking in riddles and explain this more directly". The screen flashed again and I saw my beautiful friend shopping for makeup in her favorite makeup store, Sephora. I smiled and nodded and said to him, "She'd spend hours there is she had the money". We both giggled and he said, "She just got an unexpected birthday gift of cash from her Mom. So she was told to go utilize her gift."
I was excited for her as my guide and I watched this movie. She was like a kid in a candy shop, ooohing and ahhhhing at every thing the sales lady brought in her direction. But then I saw myself enter the movie. She bought her makeup and then rushed to the restroom in the mall, leaving me holding her shopping bags. I gasped as I saw myself reach into the bag the moment she disappeared, and then I watched in horror as I slid the eye liner into my back pocket. "I'd never do that!" I screamed at my guide again haughtily.
"We know. Bear with us." Suddenly the mall cops rushed to my side and accosted me. "You can't take that gift that she chose for herself!" the mall cop said to me with an outstretched hand. "Give it back, it belongs to her". Bewildered, I responded, "But I used the gift. It's mine now, look I have put the eye liner on my eyes!" "It's still her eyeliner. It was a gift to her, and no one can take a gift away, even if it's utilized by you or another person".
"Ahhhhhh I get it now" I sighed with my head in my hands. "I can't believe I didn't get this without your help", I laughed coyly and smiled at my guide. "It's ok. You're still a baby", he replied with a pat on my back. "Doesn't matter if you used the gift someone else gave her (and the one she chose) on yourself. It's still her gift. You're using it but it's not yours. Your life is the same. You're using it but it's not yours! However there is only one consequence: redo your life. Your entire life. Reincarnate and do it all again. When you stop your life in this fashion, you don't learn or evolve and oftentimes you will need to be re-born in order to complete the lessons you opted into at birth."
In closing, the act of suicide is very much considered that of a lower vibration because that soul is wishing to go against the akashic records and also lacks that of self-love. A soul who commits suicide has lost all personal connection to the material world and also to Source in themselves. They would have to go through the reincarnation cycle because their karma would go to a denser energy through lack of love.
They would need to develop the power of forgiveness and that the universe would have them work out their own lessons in a different life to understand how the true reality is about loving the world and loving the self. That must be achieved no matter what--suicide is like trying to take the easy way out but discovering the void space is still there. We attempt to fill this void but in return we create more karmic/spiritual lesson cycles for ourselves. The true power will always be of the higher frequencies through forgiveness and love.
This blog is dedicated to my best friend Kimberlee, with much love.